The human race is losing it's humility. Funny how those two words look so the same, and yet are so far apart.

It used to be that, although there was definite hierarchy between people according to breeding and social stature, nobody was the absolute highest. Even the king, appointed by heaven, was under God's law, and always in that sense, a subject of someone greater. This resulted in a certain grace, a sense of generosity and kindness - obviously not for everyone, but for most - due to the perspective that life gave. No matter how well off you were, it was easy to see that life could have dealt you a raw deal - you could have been the one sitting in the gutter, as opposed to sitting in the banquet hall.

Now, it seems, people take the credit themselves for where they are in life. All of us have *so* much - not at all because we've earned it, but because we are lucky enough - blessed enough - to have been born into it. There are those who work their way up from the gutter to the banquet hall, but they are few and far between. I acknowledge them utterly, for the battles that they have fought to be accepted by society. For it seems to me that now, in this age of material value and supposed classlessness, that everything is the same as it was, say, in the middle ages. We have simply ceased to be grateful.

Those who are born into the richer sector of society use what they have, and either grow richer, or stay the same. Those who are poorer, struggle, and hit dead ends when - if - they gain the courage to try and change the way things are, for them or for others like them.

Just to clarify - I'm not talking about minor differences. I'm talking middle-class suburbia vs. third-world poverty.

The difference is, the poor people are grateful. Grateful for every day they live. Grateful for the lives of the people that they know. Grateful for the dirty water they may have to walk miles and miles to obtain. They realise that things could be worse, and they thank God for the opportunities they have. Opportunities to love people, and help others, and simply the fact that they can wake up in the morning and see the sky.

How many of us wake up in the morning and thank God that we can see the sky, that we can walk out into the street and stretch our arms and legs and just *live* ~ without worrying about whether we will be alive tomorrow. Do you take that opportunity? I'm not saying that I always do...only that I always should.

There is just SO MUCH for us to be grateful for...

And I love that I've learnt to be grateful, because it's enriched my life immensely.

Try it. Walk out into the rain, and smell the freshness in the air. Climb a tree and stare into the sunshine. I know I always seem to talk like this, but it's simply because I love living life. (It's not just an internet thing either - I got told last night that I 'bounce' into rooms!) See the beauty in life for what it is...

It is all about the Little Rascals. That movie has the most gorgeous soundtrack! (I only know cause we're watching it now, at lunch...) Ahahaha... the little kid just fell in the lake!! And they can't read! Sooo cute.
Funny, the last few days have been so flippantly cool....my life has exploded with possibilities and yet everything is almost exactly the same while being totally different. (That didn't make any sense, did it? Well...I'm not explaining!)
There's an exceptionally cute kid in this film with dreadlocks...hehehe...it's so funny...if anyone wants to see why I like kids, rent this movie. (Plus, being in touch with your 'inner kid' is so fun! Try fingerpainting again sometime, reading books with pretty pictures, dancing in the rain and jumping in puddles, giving piggyback rides, watching disney movies...trust me, it's worth feeling silly just for the fun. But do it with someone else. That way you get to be silly and laugh at the other person being silly at the same time!)
Everyone in our year level taking Biology is getting a duckling today :) Tomorrow the whole school is going to be full of girls carrying ducklings around in boxes - love it. Especially in the middle of classes...
Better than frogs though!

"Uhh...There's a perfeckly logical explanation for all this...which I'll make up later!" - Alfalfa, 'The Little Rascals'

August seems to have flown by, and yet when I look at how full the updates calendar is and how much has happened, I realise that August has been a relatively huge month. Still, in terms of my impact on the world, nothing life changing has happened, sadly. I'm getting there! I just...am still unsure of exactly what I'm doing. Have a couple of ideas blossoming currently though, so we'll see if they go anywhere.
I tried (again) to post a pic as a header for this page today, but something is rotten in the state of Denmark, and it won't work. Grrr...I hate not being particularly apt with technology! It's so beautiful too...I'll keep trying. I want you all to see it.
Even though it's only Tuesday, I feel like the weekend's almost here. (Here's hoping the week will fly by...)
And now, just cause I love it, here's a beautiful poem about time. Gives perspective, and the imagery is stunning.

The Waterfall, by R D Fitzgerald.

We never went back. Doubtless all that we knew
is gone now. Water over the fall
in terms of atoms, molecules, drops, eddies,
is not that water, the same leaping silver;
the trees have tried new leaves year after year;
and we cannot tread twice on the same earth.
Even the grey rocks are not as we saw them,
since light has rushed somewhere out in space
which made them rocks for eyes hardly these eyes.
We might perhaps touch again rough surfaces,
but not with changed hands declare them unchanged.

Nor is it enough to say: 'The mind keeps
days, places, happenings; nothing is lost.'
I would not dispute the mind's vision as truth
or deny its vast permanence; but there is more
to take into account than preserved moments.

For water breaks from the cliff always; and breaks
while we recall it thus breaking long since,
whether or not other eyes watch it now.
Therefore it must be said places endure
more than just in our minds, here, elsewhere,
or at some saved instant; that under change
the changeless breathes air with no taste of time,
apart from men breathing or places breathing
which yet are caught in it - caught in their own shadow
breathing, like moon-shadow that breathes the moon.

A self clings to the changed place, and is
its life still; as the heart knows, perceiving
how what the fall is, is the old thought
of water becoming mist, melting in mist,
of green dripping scrub little more solid
than green mist would be, and of free void
disguised as rock, dropping to final mist.
It is a drift, then a quickening of waters
towards the gay leap to justify being -
a thing surely of spirit, not atoms, molecules;
and so it survives, though we never went back
pushing our way through stiff tea-tree, nor back
to youth and the first days of love - threaded
with beads that mist put in your dress and hair.

That's the title of the song I'm listening to at the moment. Billy Joel. I love it - this is the only non-classical music that I ever heard when I was growing up (this, the Beatles, Cold Chisel, Roy Orbison...my dad's music!) This, and the Thunderbirds, are the only things I ever really shared with my dad.
Now, he cuts out interesting articles in the newspaper that he thinks I'd like to read and gives them to me, comes and picks me up from parties in the middle of the night, and tells me to get off the phone any time after ten pm. But generally...now I think he's an ok guy. Which is the BIGGEST relief, cause we used to be so confused and angry with each other... there's so much misunderstanding between some parents and kids. It's sad...
Anyhow ~ this is my challenge for the day. For myself, and for anyone else who wants to take it up. (Let me know how you go - it's hard!)

Take the day as it is.

In itself, without worrying about the future or considering the past. Your instinctive knowledge will kick in and somehow you'll realise that today takes care of itself, before you stress about tomorrow. I have so much trouble with this - especially right now :)
I like what I have so much that I get concerned that I'll screw it up! Like in Empire Records: "Now is an excellent time." So, instead of trying to 'plan' tomorrow - a futile and stressful exercise - I'm focusing on enjoying today! Try it... it can be fun! Look for the good stuff, always...

"And I'm looking to the sky to save me
Looking for a sign of light
Looking for something to help me, burning bright
And I'm looking for a conversation
Looking cause I'm tired of lying
Make my way back home when I learn to fly..."
~ Learn to Fly, Foo Fighters.

I had a truly blissful day today.
Drank milkshakes, lay on the grass and watched the sky, went window shopping (for three hours) and ... yeah. It was good. Exceptionally so.
One of those days that you just can't believe is happening...but it is.
Also, met up with a few Melbourne TIG members (all the ones who weren't enjoying the intense snowfalls up at Hotham!) for lunch and discussion-y things...
I missed most of the discussion. I went window shopping instead :P But it wasn't TIG stuff anyhow, so that was ok. :) I missed lunch, too.
Then we all went for coffee. Which was good.
And amazingly enough, for once I am in the mood for schoolwork! So I better go and do some, otherwise it won't happen...
Hope to hear from people soon. Apparently I'm getting business cards on Wednesday!! :) Very cool.

Woohoo! I aced my sac today.
Or at least I think I did. I will comment on this when I know :)
I love history. Next year I'm going to be such a humanities gal - three different kinds of english, history, politics and ...chemistry. Maybe I'll drop it. It's haaard. But I should have willpower and keep on trying...
I got A's in Chem last semester...
It's on my mind...sorry, I'll write about relevant things now.
The Melbourne TIG team have been having interesting online discussions about what we're actually doing...we don't know yet...but we're getting there...we have lots of ideas, and no mission statement.
I have to let my brother write to his girlfriend (they're only 13 - it's sweet) now, so TTFN but as always I'll keep the world posted. (He says to say he's very sexy. MEN! Honestly...)
I really have to think of more interesting things to say...hopefully after this weekend I will have heaps of news.

Bad stuff:
I'm pretty sure I failed my Chemistry test.
I'm really hungry, and I won't be home for an hour.
I didn't get a lunch break (music theory lesson)
SAC looms over me - it's tomorrow

Good stuff:
Yoga first period
History actually made sense today
I gave out party invitations :)
Turkey and cranberry on wholemeal sandwitch and chocolate biscuit and crispy green apple for lunch. (That was five hours ago. :( )
Looking forward to the weekend - only two days to go! Six periods! I'm not figuring out the hours...but not many!
Getting my hair cut on Friday...

We finished watching Empire Records today (see previous update).

I wish I had the guts to shave my head. Sadly, I wouldn't end up looking like Debra. I'd just look ugly. So I haven't done it. Yet. I did cut my own hair last night though. It wasn't noticable to an outsider, but I know I did it.

Trying to free yourself from vanity is *hard*. I mean...I know there's more to me than how I look, but who sees it at first glance? All that people see is the look that my environment - and to a point, myself - has created...

I wish I had the guts to be a bit more alternative.
And I will...at uni. Or after Year 12. Or maybe even next year.
Or sadly, maybe never.
Maybe I should get dreadlocks.
Naturally red dreads...that would be quite funky. (I've wanted to do it since I was about five, actually...)
Only problem is, they probably wouldn't look red any more, cause they'd be so dirty and stuff...maybe not. Anyone know?

Maybe I'll just get it cut. Short. Er. A lot.

(I would have said something deep and meaningful in this update, but I said way too much of that in my last update, so this time you get to hear my hairstyle options. Fun!)

On that note, if you were *really* unlucky, you'd get to hear my "Being single sucks and I feel like Bridget Jones" spiel, but I figure you're probably so busy by now figuring out which would be *worse*, dreads or a shaved head, that if I overloaded your ugly and boring circuits you'd probably explode.

And then I wouldn't have anyone to write to.

So I'll leave you to ponder that, and suggest interesting do-it-yourself hairstyles that would completely freak out anyone who knows me. Let's get creative, people!

(NB. This update had been completely tongue-in-cheek. Well, most of it. But I really do want to hear your hairstyle suggestions!)

What do we all think?

Personally, it rates very low on my importance scale. Sixteen years of too much money has mean that for me, I would be perfectly happy to live out the next sixty years with significantly less than I've ever materially had access to - and even with what our society would call 'not a lot of money', I would still be within the top 10% of the world's richest people. (NB - owning a CAR puts you in that top 10%. Access to running water? That puts you in the top 20%.)

Helen Keller said "I would rather be blind than have sight and no vision." I would rather have nothing, and know that people I will never meet are alive because of what I have been able to give them, than have "everything" materially, and realise at the end of my life that I have done nothing except use the gifts that God has given me - for me.

At the same time - I want to go to Uni. Get a good job. Travel. Have access to todays 'perks' - basic stuff, like a TV, CD player, computer...

That's my question. Where do we draw the line, between bettering ourselves, and bettering the lives of others who can't make it without our help? If you've never thought about it ~ now is the time. There is no other time.

This is heavy stuff, but hey - you didn't have to read it. And ignoring it doesn't make it go away for them, only for us.

Today seriously reminds me of Office Space. Even though we're watching Empire Records in our lunch break. Mondays suck. Especially when you have Physics AND Chemistry. However...at least it's not Rex Manning Day. (There's always a silver lining...even if the money is in Atlantic City, recirculating.)
Sorry. I'll start talking sense now.
I'm waiting to hear back from way too many people for my inbox to be empty...and it is. Disappointing. Oh well.
I love Empire Records.
Especially the scene where she shaves her head. I always wanted to do that. Sort of. Except everyone I know would kill me. But otherwise, yeah!

"In this life, there are nothing but possibilities."

"Now is an excellent time."

" 'You did have hair when you went in there right?' 'Yeah, it's still in the sink if you wanna glue it.'"

"I went to rock and roll heaven, and I wasn't on the guest list."

"'What's with you today?' 'What's with TODAY, today?'"

Such a brilliant movie.